My aim is to use the most effective therapeutic tools available to support relationships that involve gender and sexual diversity.
Believing strongly that attachment theory provides the deepest understanding of love and relationships, I use Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for Couples*, which relies on the following strengths:
Non-Blaming: in sessions, we focus on how each person reacts to cues from the other and how this interaction can get hi-jacked by past events, misinterpretations, assumptions, and defense mechanisms; no one person is ever to blame.
Non-Shaming: we also strive to deeply understand and validate the emotional drivers of peoples’ behaviors holding firmly to the belief that we are all trying our best to deal with really difficult situations and feelings.
Client-Centered: we move at the pace in which each partner is willing and able; there are little to no prescriptive rules, agenda, skills, or dialogs.
Personal & Interpersonal: the process helps each person understand her or his own internal cycle and how that interacts with others’.
Experiential: EFT uses exploration of the hardest moments we face with our loved ones to then encourage expressions of our deepest longings, worries, and needs.
Real Change: EFT aims to create change at the core level of our beliefs about ourselves and others making intimacy safer, freer, and more open to the deep connections we all crave.
Rounding out my knowledge about what can get in the way of truly loving connections, I am trained and experienced in the following:
Using Imago dialog and other interpersonal skills
Anxiety disorders that affect couples such as hoarding and OCD
Reviving intimacy in low/no sex relationships
Recovering from infidelity (emotional and/or physical affairs)
Conflict resolution (certification as a General Civil Mediator)
*The term “couples” is intended to include all manner of relationships from monogamous to polyamorous, romantic to plutonic, traditional to “kink.” For more information, please check out my FAQs of Couples Counseling.
Current Group(s) at GTC:
Gay Men’s Process Group: helping gay men live fuller lives by focusing on authentic and affirming relationships and experiences.
Other Group Interests:
Aging Gayfully: providing a non-youth centered forum to support living fully and happily as we age.
LGBTQ Secular Spirituality: life can have meaning, purpose, awe, connection, community, morality, traditions, and a bigger picture view without some of the harsh aspects of faith systems that have historically not been kind to the LGBTQ community.